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October 10, 2008

Farmer Bob in the Suburbs

BobonTractor3.jpg by you.

Since Bob now has all kinds of time on his hands, he can play with his tractor toys in the dirt.  And play is exactly what he has been doing the last several days - and I have the dirty laundry to prove it.  Finally.  Thank God.  We've lived here for 3 years and the yard has looked like a bunch of landscape loafers live here.  Our poor neighbors are completely convinced that we do not know a dang thing about taking care of a lawn.  As far as they are concerned, the Maryland Hillbillies arrived 3 years ago and they cringe every time they walk, run, or drive by our home.   So, if any of them are reading this, then let me show you the Bob I know well...

 WoodbineHome.jpg by you.

In Maryland, Bob was the Lord of Landscaping, the God of Green, the Master of Mulch.  Our 3 acres in Woodbine, Maryland was magnificent.  So magnificent, in fact, that we took turns mowing every other day the glorious bed of Kentucky bluegrass that carpeted our yard.  I had so much fun riding around on our zero-turn radius Kabota, that I would joyfully skip to my mower. (Yep, it was mine, all mine.  A mother's day gift the first year we were in our first home - in Woodbine). So, with my Boze headphones attached securely to my head, and my iPod in the pocket of my shorts playing my favorite tunes - Led Zepplin to Randy Travis, I would sing and cut the grass while dozens of barn swallows would dance around me and dive for my head on occasion (where's my fly swatter?). 

Anyway, I would cut the yard twice - in a checkerboard.  Daggone was it pretty.  I just love grass that is so plush you just want to run thru it with your bare feet and have a picnic.  No ants.  No ugly bugs.  No weeds.  Just green, plush, soft, rich grass.  Okay, I'm starting to daydream here...

 FrontYard.jpg by you.

Back to reality.  Actually, this dirt looks very nice.  This top soil has been a big expense, but for the first time since we've lived here, I am beginning to think that Bob knows how to win the war of the lawn in North Carolina.  Bob has spent the last week spreading it around nice and neat, and aerating it.  Then he put down 600 lbs of grass seed, lime, fertilizer, and then straw.

 LookingintoRichardsYard.jpg by you.

Before the heavens open up and give us an acre of mud - again - for the umpteenth time.

 FrontBedofHouse.jpg by you.

This is not the landscaping I had planned for the front of our home.  But I must say that my Big Bear has worked very hard to make it this far.

 FrontYard3.jpg by you.

First he put in a drainage system that would make Union County and the residents of our community very proud.  In fact, they are quite proud of his installation of 2 (count them "2") 5000 lb drainage catch basins (or storm culverts) between our neighbor's yards on both sides of our home.  Every time it rained the run off went across our front yard like a rush of river and flooded our neighbor's driveway and yard to our right entirely.  It was messy.

 SpreadingtheHay6.jpg by you.

So Bob rented the equipment to carry the culverts and bury them.  Put it this way, with his tractor, a rented bobcat, and whatever other equipment it is that he rented over the last few years, he single-handedly built the entire drainage system himself, working tirelessly alone (and with my help to maneuver the 5000 lb culverts into exact position at 2am and with flood lights that were certainly giving the neighbors some late night grief.) - You never thought I could handle heavy equipment? Let me tell ya, I know how to handle heavy equipment.  Of course, Big Bear taught me how to handle heavy equipment and I taught him how to ride a Harley.  Fair trade, right?

 FrontYardDirt.jpg by you.

So, Bob spread this nice topsoil around the yard.  We're coming down the homestretch to a green lawn!

 BobonTractor2.jpg by you.

The only green in our yard is what you see behind Farmer Bob aka Big Bear, and that is where he put the drainage system last year.

 BobonTractor4.jpg by you.

Will somebody please move that volleyball in the front yard before it gets smashed?

 BobonTractor5.jpg by you.

Doesn't Big Bear look like he is in his element?

 BobonTractor7.jpg by you.

I mean, really now, how many guys who live in the suburbs of Charlotte have tractors and shovels, aerators and big tanks, for spraying their yards? Oh, in the suburbs no less.

 BobonTractor8.jpg by you.

I could just sit here all day and watch Bob work.

 BobonTractor10.jpg by you.

Knowing that when it is all finished, our yard will finally be glorious.  And just in time to have to sell the house to another family if we can't make our mortgage payments anymore.  No thanks to AVAYA! The dirty, dirty, dirty, dirt.



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